Emotional Quotient (EQ)

-


I believe EQ (Emotional Quotient) is more important than IQ (Intelligence Quotient), as IQ is more of a individual quality, but EQ deals with people around us.  There is also AQ (Adversity Quotient) which will not be talked about in this post.

One of the worst things we can be labelled as is “This person has no EQ…”.  Hence it is essential we understand what it entails.

  • Self-awareness :  The ability to recognise and understand our moods, emotions, and drives, as well as their effect on other people.  When we are angry, are we consciously aware that we are angry?  And that anger can make us say and do things we may regret?  When we are unreasonable, do we know that we are being unreasonable?
  • Self-regulation : The ability to control or redirect our disruptive impulses and moods.  The propensity to suspend judgement, to think before acting.  Are we able to control our actions when we are angry, moody or stressed?
  • Motivation : The passion to work for reasons that go beyond money or status.  Is money our priority (this will be elaborated in a later post)?
  • Empathy : The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people.  The skill in treating people according to their emotional reactions.  Are we able to read other people's mind by listening to what they say and watching their body language? Are we observant and sensitive to other people's needs? Or do we almost always jump to conclusions?
  • Social Skill : The proficiency in managing relationships and building networks.  The ability to find common ground and build rapport.

There are some people who seemingly lacks EQ, because they are overly friendly/caring/nice. This is the group that I find most reluctant to advise, because their intention is usually good.  

Example: I had a neighbour who often traveled back to his home country.  After each trip, he would give me some cookies that he brought back. I kept telling him that there is no need to do that, although I thanked him every time he did. The point is, I don't really like cookies (too dry for me), and it will be a waste giving them to me so regularly.  I hinted a few times, but he didn't get it.  This stopped only after he moved back to his home country permanently.

I mean, he is a nice person, and I enjoy being his friend. But the cookies. I would prefer some cooking oil instead. 😊

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Practicality

-
Image
One of my former Principals called me a "practical" person, in a good way.  She was telling the rest that to be effective, it is not about doing a lot of things, but doing the right things.  For me, I guess it is more about using logic to help in my decision making. I am not very certain how a practical person is being defined, because it is not likely for a person to be 100% practical. A good match, in my opinion, would be being practical but yet flexible enough to know how to make good decisions fast. The following points are put together after analysing my thinking and choice of actions.  Other practical persons may do things slightly differently. 1.  Sticking to the objective.  When I make decisions, it is heavily dependent on how likely it will achieve the objective of the task.  Many people, when they start brainstorming, may come up with ideas that stray further away from the objective. And in meetings, I am usually the one who voice this out and bri...
Read more

Difference between a Quiz and a Survey

-
Image
I asked a group of students in a group chat :"Does any of you use any other chat apps besides Whatsapp?  If yes, what are they?" One person replied :"Telegram".  And no one else responded after that.  When I asked why no one else replied, a few said "cos same, telegram". So, this blog is to to talk about the difference between a quiz and a survey, according to my humble understanding. A quiz is likely to be one that has a fixed answer, or a fixed set of answers.  For example, if someone asked :"What is 1+1?".  There is no need to respond if the person who responded earlier gave the correct answer.  We can, of course, say the same answer or give another answer if we think the answer given was incorrect.  In this case, it doesn't matter how many people respond to the quiz (but of course, a teacher will want more students to try to answer). On the other hand, a survey requires as many people to respond as possible, because the sample group size ...
Read more

Forgive Others Whenever We Can

-
Image
  Most Chinese would know the phrase 得饶人处且饶人, which means, to forgive others whenever we can. This has been a very useful strategy for the Chinese.  Because when we force someone into a corner, we may trigger his need and urgency to fight back. This can then put us into a less advantageous position. There is another saying 狗急跳墙 : When a dog panics, it can jump over a wall. Hence, do not press the super-power button on your enemy. But, many Chinese would not know the full context of the former phrase.  It came from a high priest who gained enlightenment by spending many years playing the Chinese Go, and finally understanding the deeper meaning in it. 烂柯真诀妙通神 一局曾经几度春 自出洞来无敌手 得饶人处且饶人 Literal translation:  The game of Chinese Go is intriguing. One could spend a few years on a game. Never met a stronger opponent after coming out from the cave (meditation/enlightenment). Forgive others whenever we can.  Referring to the context from "never met a stronger opponent..."....
Read more