Meaningful Living

The way we sleep affects our life in a huge way.  From short term mood swings, to long term health issues.  Listed below are what I learned from doctors. For good sleep and spine health, a firm mattress is needed.  The best sleep posture is on the back, meaning face up.  This gives the best support for the spine. When lying on the back, the head should be aligned with the spine as best as possible, with good support under the neck. We can also put a bolster under both knees for better comfort. If we need to sleep on the side, we should put a bolster in between both knees as it reduces the stress on the spine.  This may require the knees to be bent slightly, but do not curl the body into a ball.  When sleeping on the side, we can also place a pillow against our back.  Try it! Related Reading

Think of someone you know in person. On a scale of 1 to 10, rate him/her on the amount of trust you have in the person, 1 being totally no trust, 10 being you trust him with your eyes closed.  Don’t think too much.  Let your gut feeling decide on the rating. Now that you have a score on the person, analyse your choice in your own way and give a new score where necessary. You should not be far off in your final score on the person from your gut feel.  Now why is this so?  Because how much we trust a person depends on our past dealings/experiences with that person. The job gets started quickly when we trust our team, and our team trusts us.  And, the chance of a successful execution will be high. Earning trust takes time.  To cut the long story short, the following are some attributes which I feel important to have in order to earn trust: Sincerity and Honesty:  Never lie.  All we need is one lie to bring us to the back of the pack.  Do...

Cancer is one of the biggest killers on earth.  It is basically cells gone bad and start to spread. Many factors, including air pollution, taking too much unhealthy food, charred BBQ food, smoking (including second-hand smoke), produce free radicals in our body.  These free radicals are unstable unpaired electrons. As such, they like to attach themselves to our cells in order to achieve stability, thus affecting our healthy cells.  To neutralise free radicals, we need anti-oxidants, which are found commonly in fruits and vegetable.  Some common cancers are listed below. Pancreatic / Colorectal Cancer The World Health Organisation released a report in 2015, stating studies that found the relationship between red meat consumption and pancreatic/colorectal cancer.  Pancreatic cancer is sometimes known as the king of cancer, because of the high mortality rate.  The occurrence is even higher for those who consume a lot of red meat and drink/smoke. ...

During the course of my work, I have had the opportunities to talk with some Design Directors.  I once asked one of them what he looks for in a job interview.  He told me, amongst all the standard questioning, he watched out for the candidate’s body language, as well as whether he pushed his chair back in before leaving the room.  He said, “A person who bothers to push the chair in, will likely be bothered to find things to do. A person who didn’t, will likely miss details in work.” He did clarify that although there is no strong correlation between pushing in the chair and work style, he believes in his gut feeling for a person’s attitude, exhibited by how he spoke, and not what he spoke. It is not about the task, but about the attitude.   His thinking mirrored mine.  Examples of little things that we can be bothered do: Saying Thank You; Taking time to plan; Taking note of deadlines; Helping with house chores; Returning trays after eating at fas...

Some people tend to forget to do things rather frequently. Forgetting tasks may disadvantage ourselves, inconvenient others or displease our bosses. Of course, there are ways to help improve our memories, but a successful person does not depend solely on his memory . Here are some simple tools/ways to ensure we do not forget any tasks. 1. Notebook   I keep a small notebook (A5 size).  Every time a task is given to me at work, it is jotted down and form part of my to-do list.  After completing each task, I check it off and this is usually followed by a sense of satisfaction.  If I need to make notes in the process of completing any task, the notebook is there. Important decisions, rationales, some meeting notes are also recorded in the notebook during the meeting itself. When all the tasks on one page has been completed, I will draw a line across the page, so that I won't need to look through that page again for uncompleted tasks.  I also use the notebook to list...

  When our children or subordinates do something wrong, before we mete out any consequences, it is useful to understand the type of error(s) made, so that we can decide on the most appropriate remedial/corrective measure.   Otherwise, the 'punishment' may be counter productive. Human Error Type Explanation Corrective measure Slips Intention was correct, but appropriate action was carried out incorrectly Training/Retraining Lapses Intention was correct, but appropriate action was missed out Provide Check Lists, Practices, Training Mistakes Knows the rules but did not follow them   Reminder, Training, Counselling Violations Knows the rules but went against them  on purpose    Discipline Action The whole idea of meting out corrective measures is for the person to improve, so that the organisation/family be...

  Heart diseases are among the biggest killers on Earth.   Doctors advise cutting out saturated fats, and doing regular exercises.   What I have been doing for the past many years: Reduce consumption of red meat.   Whenever I have a choice, I would go for fish or chicken; Reduce consumption of deep-fried food, or anything high in saturated or trans fat; Reduce consumption of processed food, especially those that do not look like the original thing. Examples: luncheon meat, ham, hotdogs (they are overly processed and hence do not look like pork meat), chicken nuggets etc; Reduce consumption of high-sugar food like cakes, ice cream and sugar drinks (at most once every two weeks); Use canola-olive oil for cooking. For the past few health checks, my blood cholesterol level is in the perfect range (high in good cholesterol, low in bad cholesterol).   What I need to work on now, is to exercise more.

I believe EQ (Emotional Quotient) is more important than IQ (Intelligence Quotient), as IQ is more of a individual quality, but EQ deals with people around us.  There is also AQ (Adversity Quotient) which will not be talked about in this post. One of the worst things we can be labelled as is “This person has no EQ…”.   Hence it is essential we understand what it entails. Self-awareness :   The ability to recognise and understand our moods, emotions, and drives, as well as their effect on other people.   When we are angry, are we consciously aware that we are angry?   And that anger can make us say and do things we may regret?   When we are unreasonable, do we know that we are being unreasonable? Self-regulation : The ability to control or redirect our disruptive impulses and moods.   The propensity to suspend judgement, to think before acting.   Are we able to control our actions when we are angry, moody or stressed? Motivation : The passion to ...

Honey is a miracle drink.  Like I mentioned in one of my previous posts, honey has kept my mouth ulcers at bay. Honey: is high in anti-oxidant, which helps reduce the risk of heart attacks, strokes, and some kinds of cancer; is said to raise good cholesterol and lower bad cholesterol; has anti-bacteria and anti-inflammatory effects, probably the reason why it is good for healing ulcer and keeping ulcers away; may help in easing some forms of coughs. Two ways I take honey: Dilute one part honey with eight parts water.  You may adjust the amount of water to suit your sweetness preference. Stir well and drink. Drizzle undiluted honey into salad. Notes: Honey is sugar though, and we should take it in moderation.  I recommend drinking diluted honey once or twice a week.   There is no need to go for high-power honey (Eg Manuka), unless we are desperately in need for some form of healing.  I like to buy those that comes in squeeze bottles as they are not messy aft...

Murphy' Law states : If anything can go wrong, it will go wrong. Murphy used his law to solve problems in his engineering work, but I have been interpreting it literally, to improve our life. I will use two simple examples to illustrate.  I have friends who told me that they are very careful on the road, and that they will not get into accidents. Here's briefly how I explained to them: Murphy's Law : If an accident can happen, it will happen. Why : It is not just about how careful we are, but also about how careless other drivers are. What : There may be drivers who beat the red light, or are too busy on the phone while driving, or worse, drunk. How : Besides following all traffic rules (what we can control), we also need to look out for signs of danger (mitigate what we cannot control). Like a speeding car, a dazed pedestrian, an obstruction on the road. Hence, we need to focus on the driving, keep an eye on the surrounding, instead of chatting with other passengers while...

A bad mouth ulcer or toothache will usually ruin our day.  As such, we need to do what we can to reduce such occurrence.  According to dentists, flossing is more effective than brushing, as flossing reaches in between the teeth to remove plaques.   Plaques are the things that allow bacteria to grow and lead to tooth decay, and they form within hours after we eat.   When the bacteria hits the nerve in our tooth, that's when pain coms.  Make it a habit to floss before brushing every evening, and we will save a ton of money at the dentist. [Check on line video for proper flossing technique] We can do the fingernail test.  Use our fingernail to scrape the sides of our teeth, especially the molars (the innermost teeth).  If we see white substances on the nail, that's plaque. Common procedures that will cost us a lot of money if we do not take care of our teeth: §   Root Canal (drilling into the tooth to remove the nerve, to remove the pain) § ...

We often hear people say "the rich gets richer, the poor gets poorer".  This usually refers to the widening of the income and wealth gap, because those who have, are more likely to earn more and save more, than those who have not.  Hence, a good government will focus on its education system, to bring low income families above the poverty line. But my post is not about money.  I refer to rich and poor in terms of ATTITUDE . Generally, a person with the right attitude, will usually make the right decisions, and outcomes tend to be good. This motivates the person to continue to use the right attitude in life.  Bosses and friends recognise this good attitude, and the person's confidence grow even bigger, leading to even better life quality. On the other hand, a person who is negative or pessimistic, will often make mistakes because he uses the heart much much more than the brain when making decisions. The bad outcomes demoralises him, and he is more convinced that life i...

Very often, when things do not turn out the way we want it to be, we get sad or frustrated.   Or worse, we get stuck in a lousy situation because we did not expect it to turn out that way. We had always hoped that things will turn out well, but we were often not prepared for the worst possible outcome.   One useful skill is to understand the Worst Case Scenario in every situation. Basically, when we consider the worst case scenario, we: 1.   are looking and planning ahead, 2.   have enough information to decide whether/how to proceed, 3.   are mentally prepared because we already foresee the possible outcomes that lie ahead. Some examples.... A.       You are booked on a 7.00 am flight and needs to be at the airport by 5.00 am. Best case scenario: You wake up on time and catch your flight. Worst case scenario: You wake up late and miss the flight.   This causes a lot of trouble requiring you to rebook the flight an...

For a long while, I breathed in and out through my nose.  Until one day a nurse told me the proper way.  Breathing in and out through the nose is alright though, because it will look awkward being seen opening our mouth for every breath we release. We should breathe in through our nose, and out through the mouth.  When breathing in, the stomach should expand, and when breathing out, the stomach should go inwards.  This proper technique can be used when we feel out of breath, or when we are stressed and need to calm down. Here's a good way to destress : Find a quiet and comfortable room; Turn on some soothing music where possible; Sit down comfortably on a chair or on the bed; Close our eyes, with hands by the side or on the thighs; Breathe in, hold for one second. Breathe out (like whistling without the whistling sound), hold for one second; Clear our mind of thoughts and focus on the music or the quietness; Repeat the breathing exercise for about 10 minutes.

  The curved driveway at my lift lobby is very narrow.  I would usually tell the cab driver to drive straight and let me alight without navigating into the driveway.  I was trying to be nice, so that the driver need not end up getting his car scratched by the pillars.   Then there was once I said the same thing to a driver and explained the reason to him.  He jokingly replied: "If I don’t drive in, I won’t be able to show off my steering skills!"  And he steered his way through very nicely and alighted me without a scratch to the car.  I clapped. Moral of the story:  You can always try to be nice, but you will never guess what others have on their mind. So it is good to have an open mind, and not let our mindset/prejudice determines the outcome.  Watch our tone when speaking, and explain the rationale wherever possible and appropriate. Many unhappiness happens because of miscommunications or misunderstanding. 1.  

Our body requires proper rest each night so as to "repair/build" itself.  Hence a proper sleep routine is important to our health.  A better health leads to a better quality of life. Daily Time Line What to note Reason 1pm onwards (10 hours before sleep) No more stimulants Avoid coffee, tea, carbonated/energy drinks, chocolates, cigarettes It takes many hours for these stimulants to leave our body.  Hence if we like these, take them in the morning, for energy boosting. 8pm onwards (3 hours before sleep) No more food Avoid late dinner, supper, alcohol It takes time for the stomach to digest these. Making our digestive system work hard while we sleep is not good for us. 9pm onwards (2 hours before sleep) No work Don’t work and don’t think about work These will stress us out. Instead, we can have a massage, read a bo...

On an episode of the US Deal or No Deal game show, the contestant was an air stewardess.   At the beginning of the show, she said :"I became an air stewardess because I like the life style, but I don’t like the work.   The job allows me to wake up at 3pm, which I like." Can you imagine the next time you are on the plane, and the lady serving you said: "What else would you like, sir?", but in her mind she could be thinking to herself: "you think I am a high class waitress?"  However, if we go experience something different while we are young, that is good. But do enjoy the experience and learn as much as we could, so that we can apply the skills and knowledge in other areas later in life. There is a saying, "Do what you love, and you'll never work another day in your life." Do we like what we do?  Or is it for the money (or the glamour)?  This goes back to the concept of Ikigai, where if we do what we like, do well in it because we like to d...